You Ever Had Those Life Changing Sh*ts?

Discussion in 'Spam Heaven' started by supaafly, Dec 9, 2008.

  1. supaafly

    supaafly Well-Known Member

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    I made the mistake of eating iHOP this morning before school and I got the big shabam breakfast with ------ing everything.
    Eggs, Bacon, Pancakes, Sausage, Ham a pot of coffee and orange juice.

    So here I am at home, I sit down on the toilet and I can feel the pain in my ass as it starts to get that familiar burn when
    HARD poops come. This time is different I said, I didnt want to sit and go through the pain of that crap coming out
    really slowly but stretching my ass really big. So I sqooze hard and SHOT that ---- out of my ass so fast.

    It tore my ass faster, but the burn was gone after I while.

    Its almost like one of those once my ass touches the seat, im done crapping type of craps. but it was a HUGE constipated havent
    crapped in 2 days crap.

    After this crap, I felt different. Like I was on drugs. A euphoria.

    I felt lighter, stronger, faster. I could have run a mile.

    I feel like my tummy is brand new and I should only fill it with healthy stuff now that I cleaned it out, like water and vegtables.

    5 minutes later I have a cup of hot chocolate with 4 table spoons of mix and some coffee cake.
    WHOOPS!
     
  2. Snooze

    Snooze Well-Known Member

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    You just brightened my day a little bit with that story. :tongue:
     
  3. BabyLeo

    BabyLeo Well-Known Member

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    I can't decide whether this is extremely disgusting or disturbingly hilarious.
     
  4. supaafly

    supaafly Well-Known Member

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    You know thats really up to you, but let me tell you this;

    Next time you take a dump, maybe you will cherish it. Maybe you will cherish those superman like feelings that last not so long.
    Maybe, just maybe
     
  5. BabyLeo

    BabyLeo Well-Known Member

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    LOL, you're last comment made me decide. Disturbingly hilarious.
     
  6. Jynx_

    Jynx_ Banned from GR

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    I was once in the toilet for an hour after coming out of a cheap indian resteraunt in London.
    The toilet was black when I got out.
     
  7. Mortified Penguin

    Mortified Penguin Senior Member

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    You mean those nigras took a dump while you were in there? Nasty.
     
  8. .//XeN-

    .//XeN- Well-Known Member

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    that's just rude.
     
  9. Mortified Penguin

    Mortified Penguin Senior Member

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    I reckon. Silly nigras.
     
  10. dinges

    dinges Senior Member

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    i know the feeling
    let's just keep it at that
     
  11. Ravr

    Ravr _______________

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    he means, a good crap gets you high
     
  12. supaafly

    supaafly Well-Known Member

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    exactly, or you can ferment your crap and make poop hash.
     
  13. .//XeN-

    .//XeN- Well-Known Member

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    jenkem*

    World's biggest trolling.
     
  14. fearbox

    fearbox Member

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    copypasta.
     
  15. Greasy Pete

    Greasy Pete Senior Member

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    lmfao!
     

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