Burning Out.

Discussion in 'Spam Heaven' started by Snooze, Oct 25, 2008.

  1. Snooze

    Snooze Well-Known Member

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    Right now I'm going through a total lack of motivation. It seems like I should be much more interested in, maybe even excited about what's going on in my own life. I'm a senior in high school, I got my driver's license last year, and my pilot's license this year. At first, flying was fun, but then Aviation grade fuel prices went through the roof. I also thought it would be cool to take girls flying on dates etc... As it turns out though, being able to fly doesn't make up for 13 years of being socially awkward and introverted.

    I've played guitar since I was 13, I've also picked up bass and drums in the last few years. Although I did get into music just for impressing girls, I have gained a genuine interest in playing music for my own personal enjoyment. I was a singer/guitarist for a band until earlier this year. I wrote a few songs for this girl from school that I like, but she never showed up to any of our concerts. I would always get her text message the next morning saying something like "Oh, was that last night? I was at a party and blah blah blah..." We eventually stopped going to band practices as we ran out of time for such things due to school or other obligations. I would have had to quit anyway because it had gotten to the point that I could barely choke out the words to most of our songs because I knew how meaningless the words had become.

    Now I go to school the everyday and stare across the library to see her just casually chatting with some dude in a Hollister shirt. I know the guy, he parks his silver Scion Tc next to my Chevy Tahoe every day. He would sit across from her and spew shtick from some stupid Comedy Central Stand-Up, and she would smile and laugh. Over and over. Little things like that just tear my heart. I know it's just harmless flirting, but the fact that I can pour my heart and soul into lyrics and get totally ignored bothers me. Well, last week I was playing one of my songs on an acoustic guitar in the auditorium after school when two girls came walking down to the stage where I was sitting.

    Textbook examples of cheerleaders. Mall clothes, flawless skin, and completely devoid of any personality. They told me that they liked my music and asked why I didn't have a myspace or anything. I knew that I would just be wasting my breath explaining my problems with News Corp. besides, I had learned when to shut my mouth about politics, so I just said "It's just a stupid song, I'm not that good. Plus, I don't have any means to record it." So they ask where I'm going after high school, if I have a girlfriend, etc. They tell me that they've seen my band play at a few shows. They ask me what kind of music I listen to, I just named some bands I thought they would know. After a while, they end up inviting me on their senior trip to Florida. I told them I would see if I could (I could), and that I might already be going on a trip with someone else (I wasn't).

    So that's where I am. The girl I love still doesn't know I love her, and I can't even give a straight answer to the girls that are interested in me. I have my pilot's license, but nobody wants to get in a small plane. Not like I can afford the gas anyway.

    And yes, I am aware of how sappy and melodramatic that whole story is. I just started typing and didn't stop until I felt I had nothing more to say. I'm not looking for pity, and I'm not in any way depressed about my life, just a little disappointed in myself. It does feel good in a really strange way to be able to write this all out.

    tl;dr: I'm a middle-class white kid with middle-class white kid problems.
     
  2. AnythingPink

    AnythingPink Well-Known Member

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    What exactly are the problems a middle-class 'white kid' faces? Considering I'm blaqk I wouldn't know

    And I just suggest waking the hell up. You won't get anywhere feeling lazy from lack of motivation. You'll just have to do what is called "hard work" and put effort into doing something productive cause no one else can. And the rest of the story I didn't get.
     
  3. Snooze

    Snooze Well-Known Member

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    I didn't mean anything offensive or racist, I just meant that I was being melodramatic because my problems have simple solutions like, "Just waking the hell up.". In retrospect that was a really bad way to put it... sorry about that. I didn't mean to start anything. That entire post was just me running my... er... mouth. (?)
     
  4. Mortified Penguin

    Mortified Penguin Senior Member

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    tl;dr.

    But after reading that I can understand what you're saying.
     
  5. mthemapc

    mthemapc Well-Known Member

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    Yo, I feel for you man and I feel like I will probably be the same exact way when I'm a senior... As long as I have friends I don't care if I don't have any girlfriends, they'd just be temporary anyways so I just say bros before hos.
     
  6. Snooze

    Snooze Well-Known Member

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    I'm not at all saying that girlfriends are a waste of time, that's not my point. Just don't be such a coward like me.
     
  7. AnythingPink

    AnythingPink Well-Known Member

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    So if their simple why make them more complicated than what they are? And that wasn't a bad way I put it. I mean seriously, if you know your life isn't going the way you want. Then YOU have to take charge and get moving. And sometimes others need another to light a firecracker under their butt to get them moving.

    But anyhow, I'm sure we all go through this phase. I did.. Mostly on track now though.

    And don't be surprised if others come in here flaming, afterall this is teh spam heaven :tongue:
     
  8. mthemapc

    mthemapc Well-Known Member

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    HAHA, asking girls out is my only fear dude. Any other thing my friends tell me to do 90% of the time I do it but when it comes to asking out girls, its like my balls are gone.
     
  9. Snooze

    Snooze Well-Known Member

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    I know... I'm not trying to make them seem complicated, I posted this because I wanted someone to light that proverbial firecracker. I wanted someone to tell me how dumb I'm being and get me motivated. Thanks for your input Anything-Pink. ^_^ I'm just sitting here in my room stewing right now, deciding what to do with my life.
     
  10. AnythingPink

    AnythingPink Well-Known Member

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    Girls aren't all that anyhow.

    And you shouldn't have to be afraid to ask someone out.. Just be yourself and natural with it. If it goes well then great, if not then don't worry about it, not like you'd have ended up married to the person. You have your whole life ahead.
     
  11. .//XeN-

    .//XeN- Well-Known Member

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    lol'd
     
  12. AnythingPink

    AnythingPink Well-Known Member

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    So if their simple why make them more complicated than what they are? And that wasn't a bad way I put it. I mean seriously, if you know your life isn't going the way you want. Then YOU have to take charge and get moving. And sometimes others need another to light a firecracker under their butt to get them moving.

    But anyhow, I'm sure we all go through this phase. I did.. Mostly on track now though.

    And don't be surprised if others come in here flaming, afterall this is teh spam heaven :tongue:
    [/b][/quote]

    I know... I'm not trying to make them seem complicated, I posted this because I wanted someone to light that proverbial firecracker. I wanted someone to tell me how dumb I'm being and get me motivated. Thanks for your input Anything-Pink. ^_^ I'm just sitting here in my room stewing right now, deciding what to do with my life.
    [/b][/quote]

    *attempts to light the proverbial firecracker*

    GET OFF YOUR BUTT AND DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE! I AM SO TIRED OF YOU SITTING AT HOME CLEARING OUT MY DAMN REFRIGERATOR. YOU NEED TO START PAYING BILLS AROUND HERE MISTER. OR NO MORE XBOX LIVE!!!

    How's that? ^_^
     
  13. mthemapc

    mthemapc Well-Known Member

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    I know... I'm not trying to make them seem complicated, I posted this because I wanted someone to light that proverbial firecracker. I wanted someone to tell me how dumb I'm being and get me motivated. Thanks for your input Anything-Pink. ^_^ I'm just sitting here in my room stewing right now, deciding what to do with my life.
    [/b][/quote]

    *attempts to light the proverbial firecracker*

    GET OFF YOUR BUTT AND DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIFE! I AM SO TIRED OF YOU SITTING AT HOME CLEARING OUT MY DAMN REFRIGERATOR. YOU NEED TO START PAYING BILLS AROUND HERE MISTER. OR NO MORE XBOX LIVE!!!

    How's that? ^_^
    [/b][/quote]
    That was great man, made me smile and laugh some.
     
  14. Snooze

    Snooze Well-Known Member

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    Sounds like my mom, just add, "AND TURN DOWN THAT AMPLIFIER!!! I'M SELLING YOUR GUITARS!!!" :tongue:
     
  15. Undertow

    Undertow Senior Member

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    I didn't know Dr. Phil was black and posted on this forum.
     

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