1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life... (Inside card) - I've changed my mind. 2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life... (Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you 3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am.... (Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me. 4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go.... (Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again. 5. Someday I hope to marry... (Inside card) - Someone other than you. 6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age.... (Inside card) - Almost lifelike! 7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me.. (Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise. 8. We've been friends for a very long time.. (Inside card) - What do you say we stop? 9. I'm so miserable without you... (Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here. 10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy... (Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was? 11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket... (Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often. 12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your birthday... (Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep. 13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Alabama, Mississippi, and West Virginia) 14.Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but wonder... (Inside card) - What was I thinking? 15. Congratulations on your wedding day!... (Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband
