I've never really been in any relationships before now, and I'm still a virgin. Every year for the past few years I've had at least one friend who always tried to hook me up with some hot girl for casual sex and I always refused. Now I'm going out with this one girl and I will say it's far harder staying celibate now... I really like her and don't want to disappoint her(she's the aggressor in this case) though I would like to maintain my temperance, I don't even care about the idea of having sex, just not disappointing her. there will be emotional bull---- and the like and I'm still sorting through things myself just internally, but I shall see. prologue aside, who here is celibate? What are your thoughts on celibacy, even if you're not.
Celibacy is an excuse for people who can't get any or people who haven't had the pressure of opportunity given to them. When you're pressured for sex, either to please the other individual or please yourself, you cave in eventually. It's just human nature. Then again, a relationship won't go far if either of the individuals are pressuring for something the other individual doesn't want to do. That is called selfish, and its extremely typical in young individuals relationships. One individual cares so much for the other person, and the other person hardly cares about the individual and cares far too much about themselves. These relationships can last months possibly years... generally not though. On the other hand, coming from someone who lost his virginity around his 14th birthday, I can state that saving sex until your in a meaningful relationship makes it *so* much better, especially if both of the individuals concerned are virgins (I can't speak so much on this, just the guilt I have when I find out the girl I am with is a virgin and I can't count how many women I have hooked up with casually), or care equally about one another. Sex seems fun, but honestly it's not what its cracked up to be. You can get an orgasm from anything, sex for the purpose of an orgasm is nothing more than a glorified masturbation session. Sex on an emotional level when your emotionally bonded with the other individual, and they are to you, makes the entire experience worth so much more.
You, my friend, have spoken the truth. Let it be known that, sex is not something to do for the sake of pure pleasure but as a thing you share with someone special.
x2, totally true. I'm a virgin as well, (believe it or not ). And it has been completely my choice. For me it's not only about saving myself for that special someone, but also to protect myself. There is just so many people, especially gay guys who have an STD. It's crazy. Last thing I want is to catch something from performing something with someone of no significance just to "get off".
Yes, why waste your time with the risk of diseases and taking someone's viriginity which they can never get back just because you want to pleasure yourself.
By the time you die, you are extremely likely to have contracted at least 1 STD statistically, just so you know (even if you only sleep with 1 person, especially if that person cheats on you at some point and you continue sleeping with them). What is it... one in five people in the US has an STD. 2/3s of all known infections occur in people under the age of 25, and 1 in 4 new infections are found in teenagers. One of the most common STDs? Herpes. Most people (and by most I mean nearly 90%) don't know they have it (this is also paired with HPV and Chlamydia, two other extremely common STDs). Reason why homosexuals have a higher rate of infection? They don't generally worry about condoms, and obviously the only way to engage in actual intercourse is through anal, which generally creates minor cuts and tears on the anus, leaving an open wound for infection. Keep in mind those stats are only taken from people who actually *know* they have an STD, the amount of infected and unaware people is dramatically higher than that (as I said, nearly 90% of all people with genital herpes didn't know they had it and there are still 40 million recorded cases in the US).
well if you count herpes simplex 1, statistically speaking, ~70% of americans have it. Most of the time it's not even contracted through sex, just kissing, usually from an adult to a child at an early age, though technically it can become an STI, it's just rare.
The forums really isn't a good place to ask this question. Most the answers you will probably get are stick your penis in her man! bla bla bla. But I will tell you something completely different. You're 19 years old right? If you are 19 and still a virgin then you probably already have a knowledge of what love should be like. And I doubt it's because you haven't had any offers of sex. So this is my opinion; my life has been full of many chances to have sex and mess around. I am 25 years old and I have had plenty experience in this department. Assuming you want to have sex with someone you love to make it special; For one thing; people who love each other will never endanger ones another's happiness and safety in exchange for temporary personal pleasure. Sometimes people try to convince themselves and others that sexual relations outside of marriage is acceptable if the participants love on another. This is not true. Having sex and encouraging someone else to do so is not an expression of love. Love does not equal sex. When people care for one another enough to not have sex, their love, trust, and commitment increase, resulting in greater happiness and unity. In contrast, relationships built on sex sour quickly. Those who have sex, usually feel fear, guilt, and shame. Bitterness, jealousy, and hatred soon replace any positive feelings that once existed in their relationship. Now this is ultimately your decision. You have been able to put of having sex for what 19 years? I promise you that if she is trying to convince you to have sex with her that is all that you will get out of the relationship and it will probably end in bitterness and sorrow. Your virtue is something special and so far you have kept it close to you. Keep that gift. As you keep yourself sexually pure, you will avoid the emotional and spiritual damage that always come from sharing physical intimacies with someone outside of marriage.
I really have to disagree, now I'm not going to take it to the point of "ZOMG JUST ------ HER". But seriously, sex isn't that big a deal. Love doesn't have to equal sex, millions of happy SAFE people have "------ buddy's" and there's nothing wrong with it, it's primarily enjoyment and it doesn't always have to lead to more/issues. Sex isn't a hindrence on a relationship, it expands it, it makes it better, if anything it's in the same vein as getting married (When you're doing it with someone you care about) in that it's, devotion to each other to the point you just want to make each other happy. Sex isn't a bad thing, it doesn't have to bring "Emotional and spiritual" damage, it CAN just be fun you know? Granted, a good relationship can't be built solely on sex. But you know what? It's a huge part of the (majority) of relationships. PS : In terms of not having sex out of marraige, all for the two people who do it in a relationship but personally I think it's one of the worst ideas ever created.
what the ------. you srsly dont believe in sex outside marriage? how ------ing old fashioned are you. if you love someone and want to ------ them then ------ them for ------s sake. its not going to ruin the relationship because you're suddenly sexing it up, unless one of you doesn't wash or something.
I wasn't referring to cold sores, as you were, notice 40 million does not equal 70% of over 300 million =P. How the virus is contracted is a topic for discussion, but its considered an STD regardless.
Agreed. Not a virgin. But the girl I lost it to meant a LOT to me...She doesnt anymore because things went bad...sadly...But definately listen to that advice, for it is very true.
