i really like the effects and the lighting on this one, and the text. One thing though, is the focal point is way to messy, maybe erase the effects on his helmet.
Hmmm... I like the effects cause they're hot. But the focul is VERY inneffective. It's not only "floating head", but it's also "I can't see the render at all". You want your focul to "pop" out of everything, so that is a weak focul. Try to get most of the effects off his head. So tighten that up and the effects would do it righteous mate.
if you could add in a sweet render with this, i would have an orgasm. seriously its great. youu should try doing this style more often and add in a render that pops out at you or stands out and fits really well with the background. the little techy lines arent really needed but they seem to add to it a bit. the colours are amazing too.
I like the effects, and the messiness. (Whatever the word is). But I agree with the aboves, the render is too blended.