Alright, I am a little bored so I thought that I would share some jokes with you all... I got a few racial ones but I won't post them because I would probably end up with -10 rep :lol: . A man runs into a doctors office and says "Doc! My penis is orange! Help me!" The doctor replies "Your penis is...orange? I have to see this for myself. Pull down your pants." So the man pulls his pants down, and infact he has an orange penis. The doctor just thinks for a second and says "Well, I may have an idea why you have an orange penis, but first, you need to tell me what your homelife is like." The man replies "Oh God, it is terrible, my wife is a bitch and my kids hate me." "And what about your job? How is that?" The man replies "Even worse, I think my boss is going to fire me soon, and I know that my co-workers hate me." "I think that this might be some sort of stress related problem, what do you do in your spare time?" "I go eat cheetos and watch porn." An older man joins a nudist colony. He is walking around the area while no one is around, naked, and notices a very, very attractive blonde women walk by him. He suddenly gets an erection. The blonde women walks back to him and says "You called for me?" "Called for you? I don't understand." "Oh well then you must be new here. When a man gets an erection, then that means that he called for me." The man replies, "Well what happens when you are called upon?" The women then gets on her knees and begins to give him a blowjob. Afterwards, the man is sitting in the jacuzzi. He looks around, and finds himself alone. Then he lets out a loud, ground shaking fart. A big, 300 pound man walks up to him, "You called?" "I didn't call for anyone" The man replies. "When someone farts, then they called for me." "Well what happens when someone calls for you?" Then the giant bends over the man and has his way with him. Not to long afterwards, the man limps into the front office, fully clothed. He tells the women at the desk, "I want to cancel my membership, I would like to go back home." Then the women asks, "Why do you want to leave?" "Listen lady, I am 68 years old, I get a boner once a month and fart 25 times a day." Keep 'em coming!
"knock, knock", "Whos their", "Me" "Me who" "Itsa me!" "MARIO!!!" wooooooo, it be pimpin! EDIT: LMFAO!! THESE JOKES KICK ASS!! HHAHAHAHA
"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Your Mom" "Your Mom who?" "No dude, When I said Your Mom that was the end of the joke" "ok..."
Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the ------tails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home. The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'
