my friend killed himself today. he was seventeen years old and was halfway through his senior year. he appeared smart, happy, and was an amazing, although relatively quiet person. it really puts life in perspective, and makes you think how precious each and everyone really is. i know it sounds chiche, but we take things for granted. everyone(including myself) thought he was fine, if we had put things in perspective maybe things would have turned out differnently? who knows...
sorry that happened. DO NOT START BLAMING YOURSELF, things happen that are beyond your control (had something similar to this happen). Do not start questioning yourself, what if i did this, what if i did that, the fact is that he is gone...and you beating yourself up inside will not bring him back. No matter how good of friends you are with someone, they will never tell you everything. Some people (like me) have different personas around different people, so many things get left unsaid among the others and are kept secret by the people they choose to tell. You can't always know everything about someone, if they don't wish you to know, chances are you won't find out until it's too late. I hate seeing/hearing about people throwing their life away, especially at such a young age. Just keep him in your heart and memory, in those places he can never die. I was almost pushed to that point, where i felt no other option was available, so i can pretty much tell you that your mind races when it get's to that point. Pretty much everything negative that has happened to you bubbles up from your sub-conscious and urges you further toward the end. The only thing left in my mind was to end my misery, i had every intention of following through with it, but luckily my friend was beside me and stopped me from doing it. Took alot of therapy, but life goes on. I continue living not for myself, but for my brother who died (not voluntarily),to make up for what he had lost and to make him proud. I digress, keep his memory alive, and don't let his death be something that haunts you, use that event as your moment of awakening...strive to be your best, if not for you, then in his memory. it's good that you decided to talk about it, expressing ourselves is one of the few ways to work through things.
Hurts when you loose someone so suddenly and you don't even understand why properly. Can't start blaming yourself though, not what he would have wanted you to do.
hey thanks for the support guys. it's interesting how people who might not normally even talk or even associate with eachother can rally together in times of need... it's appreciated guys
I'm sorry to hear about that. A friend of mine attempted suicide last year. And I have recently been thinking about how precious human life is as well. Here's just my two cents...I was in History class thinking about D-Day. So many people died in there, its just mind boggling to think that they went through life like we did, high school, girlfriends, then joined the army, went into boot, and died in an instant right as the boats doors opened up at Normandy Beach. Sorry to go on a tangent, but I just think its crazy how quickly someone can be killed.
I'm sorry for your loss; unfortunately, we can ask what we could've done differently that might've brought a different outcome, but unfortunately, it's not so. My love and thoughts go to you, his friends and his family.
Sorry to hear that mate, and I know what it is like cause my mate did the same thing a few months back...I always blamed myself cause I was a good mate but you can't it was their choice and no-one can do anything
damn that sucks, just remember its not your fault and well this might sound harsh: but it was his decision to take the cowards way out and there was probably nothing you could have done about it....
