ITs not even near complete i just made a lot of changes than the previous ver of it. pls dont be shy tell me what you think. Hail Storm Her red silk hair shimmered in the soft light coming from three of the planets six moons. A soft but firm voice coming from behind her said” Its time to go now honey.” The voice was that of her husband, Mark, she could recognize it anywhere. He was of a lean medium build, his face show like that of a man who has seen too much of a steadily darker growing universe. They started walking back to there hover craft hand in hand. When his wife opened the door a little boy jumped out and yelled “BOO!” at the top of his tiny lungs, sending his wife tumbling backward landing hard on her backside. She nimbly jumped up and growled at him “You! Little… You scared the sh” but couldn’t finish the sentence before Mark cut her off finishing with “shitake mushrooms out of her, don’t do that ever again do you understand me?”. “Yes father”, the boy said grinning broadly. “By the way”, mark whispered, “Good one” giving him a wink. A few minutes later they were up in the air soaring above the ground almost 600 ft. up, traveling about ¾ of the speed of sound. Mark pushed the auto-pilot button and slid back in his seat, switching on the universal radio with over 35 million stations but only about 8 were important and well maintained. As mark was switching though them trying to find one with stock gains and loss reports his wife said “look over there, the smoke” her finger was pointed at a large column of smoke. Mark gasped “why did it have to happen on the last day of our vacation!” switching of the auto pilot he grabbed the steering wheel and hung a sharp right, throwing them against the left side of the craft. “we’ve got to get to a safe station”, he said “ and soon too.” After what the boy though was at least 30 minuets the craft slowed and made a stead descent toward a small clearing. A raspy voice echoed over the speakers “Mark, the invasion has begun, are you safe?” Mark instantly picked up the microphone and replied “yeah, were ok, we are almost to the closest safe station. How bad is the damage already? I saw a huge cloud of smoke coming from Isniduer, is it gone?” the man on the other end paused for a short period and continued “ Its very bad, they hit most of our military out posts and air/space craft depots. Isniduer was completely and savagely destroyed by a new type of space to ground missile. It is shaped like a big syringe, one end meant to stay intact when it landed and the other explodes on impact with a very densely compacted fusion bomb.” Mark was yet again astonished “why would they use something that would destroy the planet in a war for minerals?” The voce didn’t say any more as the crackle of static returned to the speakers. He didn’t notice as he was focusing on landing the craft down in the middle of the field. After they all got out he pulled out a thin with plastic sheet, and two laser firearms. Handing one end of the sheet to his wife and son, spreading it al the way over the craft, and pushing a button on his end the craft turned instantly invisible. This technology was recently discovered and is extremely effective. The way it works is there are thousands of tiny cameras covering the craft and they each take a picture and send it around to the other side of the craft where micro lcds display the picture, this is done with every picture making a 3d replica of its surroundings. Approaching the door mark handed one of the laser guns to his wife, then stuck his hand in a box and recited his full name “Mark Ramos Degrasa” with a metallic snap the locks announced their approval to enter. Swinging the door open the lights flickered on in symphony. Pressing a complex pattern on one of the keyboards in front of larger view screens, a image of a man in his late 50’s appeared and spoke with the same voice from the radio, “Hello general Mark, hello to you to Elizabeth and, I mustn’t for get you Samuel, I haven’t see you since you were a baby.” Samuel’s face scrunched up imitating annoyance, but not quite getting it, and said “I get that a lot”. Mark spoke sharply at his son’s rudeness “That was inappropriate! Behave your self or we will lock you in the trunk until this is over. George, just get to the point.” The man on the screen grinned “As you wish. The Ciphten have taken out all our satellites, we launched this one so we could get in contact. I don’t know how long until they find this one. They had the element of surprise, we knew they were coming but not as soon as this. The Ciphten have taken 4 of our major cities already. There have been rumors of a super robot of some kind. Its bad Mark, we need you battle ready ASAP!” “I will as soon as I know where to go. Where am I needed the most?” “There are reports of enemy troops marching toward Nancuck, It might already be too late for them. Just get suited up and wait for orders. We wish you the best of luck gen-” The screen went to static. The drone of several air assault crafts could be heard coming closer. “Quick get through that floor panel! GO! GO! GO!” mark screamed at his wife and son. Explosions suddenly shattered the silence as the crawled thought the bark tunnel. “there goes the new car” mark sighed. They inched slowly through the dark and dank shaft until reaching a panel with a palm plate. “palm it please he directed his wife. Doing so the panel gave a beep and folded out ward allowing refuge into a full sized tunnel. The hiss of phosphorous lights igniting startled mark. “Lets get to the ground way.” he ordered in his stern voice that commanded respect and obedience of his men.
it goes very in detail about what the characters features are, etc. which is good in a story and writer
thx i was going to add more but i faggot ass isp whent down i will add some more sone thx mttviper that the best comment i have gotten from you in 3 years jk
Ya, me and you got our differences but just cuz you piss me off all the time i aint gonna bag on your stuff
