It's a bit bright for my taste and I don't think those colors really give the feeling of intensity like the master chief render does. You know? I think you did a nice job on the effects, but I don't see much flow. You'll get there though.
Yup, Totally agree. The colors look odd. Try sticking with colors that compliment the render. The bright clean colros don't really fit Chief imo. Also, like Darth said, try working on flow. This isn't your best imo. Keep it up.