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SprintCellFone
12-04-2005, 11:55 PM
Okay I made a new account to keep from secracy from people finding out who i am through my AKA.

And the story is, throughout the past month, 3 women all who i care about so much, have confessed their love for me. They are all beautiful and sensative like any other woman. I have been deciding about these women for so long and i do not know what to do now. I love them all the same amount. I have to choose one, before they find out that i have been "playing them."

Girl number one. She is beautiful and is very intelligent and she's just awesome to be around. Me and her share together the passion to travel back to her main country, which is South Korea. I have been dieing to go to Korea ever since i was in 10th grade (I'm in college now)

Girl number two. She is beautiful like the other's and is wild and crazy which makes it always entertaining to be around. She is full american, and can cook like a godess.

Girl number three. I have known her the shortest but she is amazing. She is super smart, and is so intelligent that it makes me seem dumb around her. However, she loves what i do. Me and her went to a bar the other day and she got wasted just to be with me, and i felt so bad because if i had slept with her, then I would feel like an ass to the other women.

Please do not give me adolescent remarks like "have intercourse with them and whoever is tighter go with them" And do not tell me things like Go with all of them at the same time and keep it a secret, because I am horrible at keeping secrets, and if i do this, i am positive that it will leak and they will all hate me forever.

I would only like to have comments that would help me out.

I am confused and if I dont tell anyone and just wait it out, they will lose their interest in me. because Love is like a plant in a pot. Once they outgrow something, you need to give them something better for your relationship to grow even taller and healthier.

-=Bob=-
12-05-2005, 12:00 AM
girl 1 sounds good to me... she seems like a very good, well-rounded person... but i think the whole decision is really on you... you really know them

j_ball430
12-05-2005, 12:01 AM
Well, here's an idea: Tell them the truth. If you truly love them, you won't want to keep anything from them.

Then, after the confessions, the three women, most likely, are going to act differently. Emotions will be expressed through their reactions, and then you will have a better idea as to how much each woman loves you, and if they truly do at all. Also, this will give you a better idea as to what extent their emotions towards you are. Some may be lust, some may be love. Only talking directly to them about this will tell.

Edited: Now that I actually understand that he changed his screenname on here... and not what I thought he said...

HydrogeN
12-05-2005, 12:02 AM
Well first off is you have to be honest with them and yourself. You must decide which one is right for you and what future plans you have set for yourself, are you looking for a "fling" or are you looking for a possible wife down the road?

BE honest with them all and you will find that they might not like the way they were mislead but they also may not mind as long as you be a man and let them know that you were not sure what you wanted, and still need them in your life.

There are many options and roads you can go from here, but be honest with yourself and follow your heart, it will always lead you in the right direction.

PS, I know who you are ;)

.Instinkt
12-05-2005, 12:05 AM
choose number 1 ;)
korea baby

Red Alert
12-05-2005, 12:06 AM
#2 she is hot and can cook thats the winner in my book

j_ball430
12-05-2005, 12:07 AM
Question: What went through your mind to ask a community mostly made up of young and ignorant members? (ie. .Instinkt and Red Alert's posts)

Also, just because one's post is ignorant doesn't mean I automatically think that the person is young. In fact, I know a lot of older people to have said and do stupid and ignorant things. :)

Edited.

aphex
12-05-2005, 12:09 AM
Originally posted by j_ball430@Dec 4 2005, 09:07 PM
Also, two things:

1. Did you join just so you could ask this community?
2. What went through your mind to ask a community mostly made up of young and ignorant members? (ie. .Instinkt and Red Alert's posts)
He has another account, he doesnt want his normal name out there.

*In the first post*

Red Alert
12-05-2005, 12:10 AM
Originally posted by j_ball430@Dec 4 2005, 11:07 PM
Also, two things:

1. Did you join just so you could ask this community?
2. What went through your mind to ask a community mostly made up of young and ignorant members? (ie. .Instinkt and Red Alert's posts)
wish I was young

j_ball430
12-05-2005, 12:12 AM
Originally posted by soari+Dec 4 2005, 11:09 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (soari @ Dec 4 2005, 11:09 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-j_ball430@Dec 4 2005, 09:07 PM
Also, two things:

1. Did you join just so you could ask this community?
2. What went through your mind to ask a community mostly made up of young and ignorant members? (ie. .Instinkt and Red Alert's posts)
He has another account, he doesnt want his normal name out there.

*In the first post* [/b][/quote]
Oh... sh!t... then disregard my first post. I misread. >.<

Just talk to all 3 of them then. Don't let the rest of us tell you what we think. If I was to be an idiot, I'd say go for girl #2 because she's American. This is really a decision to be made by you and you alone.

If you want guidance, here it goes: Talk to each of them. Tell them each how you feel. By discussing the topic, it'll open a hell of a lot more emotions in the conversation, and you can make your decision from that. Also, certainly don't base your decision off of materialism. Things fade, personality/character doesn't.

nomu
12-05-2005, 12:14 AM
i would have to agree with j_ball430, i had the same sorta problem with liking 2 girls who were both my friend and am going out with one and still friends with the other, if they like you they will understand and support you

Deathwing
12-05-2005, 12:26 AM
AT the end of the day only you can decide what's best. What works for one won't work for another.

Personally i don't think you love them that much otherwise you wouldn't be cheating on them. Thats just my opinion.

refr3sh
12-05-2005, 12:55 AM
and can cook like a godess.

i think we have teh win here.

Balnazzar
12-05-2005, 12:59 AM
If you truly do love all of them, you will turn them down. Choosing will just hurt them, you are in a predicament and there is no definite resolution..this is from experience.

T E M P L A R
12-05-2005, 01:02 AM
Do whatever she says to shut her up.

Win.

movinginshadows
12-05-2005, 01:03 AM
If you love them all as much as you do, have you ever decided on becoming a Mormon? ^_^

refr3sh
12-05-2005, 01:03 AM
Originally posted by T E M P L A R@Dec 5 2005, 04:02 AM
Do whatever she says to shut her up.

Win.
well somebody sure hasnt been in a real relationship before

j_ball430
12-05-2005, 01:04 AM
Originally posted by nomu@Dec 4 2005, 11:14 PM
i had the same sorta problem with liking 2 girls who were both my friend and am going out with one and still friends with the other, if they like you they will understand and support you
His experience is a perfect example as to how you CAN choose and have it be the correct decision. It doesn't have to be a, "I'm sorry, but I like her better than you" situation. He'd be stupid to forget about all three simply because he is close to all three. You can like several girls at once, but choose out of them. It may be harder to be satisfied with just the one person when you have desires with others, but love conquers all. Though, this may end up hurting everybody more than it would if he just did as you suggested and decided not to date them. Only he can decide, and only time can tell whether or not it'd be worth it. It's really just a judgement call.

T E M P L A R
12-05-2005, 01:24 AM
Originally posted by refr3sh+Dec 5 2005, 04:03 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (refr3sh @ Dec 5 2005, 04:03 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-T E M P L A R@Dec 5 2005, 04:02 AM
Do whatever she says to shut her up.

Win.
well somebody sure hasnt been in a real relationship before [/b][/quote]
When I was I wanted to gouge my eyes out.

All I heard out of the last chick I dated was "bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch". Ive lost all faith in a good relationship.

SprintCellFone
12-05-2005, 07:23 AM
So today I will talk to them seperately. If all goes well, and all of them do not hate me, should I go with the one who is least hurt by how i have been flurting with other women and what not behind her back? It seems to wrong to go with her because it gives me the impression then that she is less worried about that and gives the window of thought that she might be okay with because she might decide to cheat with others even if her and I decide to see how things last. Whereas the one who most affected probally had liked me more and probally is the best candidate for a long lasting relationship because she is against the idea of cheating on others the most.

How should I choose?

R E V O
12-05-2005, 07:28 AM
"Well, I don't know how to say this... But there is two other women..."

*Look of shock, followed by a slap in the face*.

:D

--

Do what feels right, man :).

Gruntkilla
12-05-2005, 12:56 PM
Dude this decision is entirely up to you man...

The only thing that struck me is that girl number 2 had the shortest description compared to the other two...

I'm not gunna give u advice - that would be so wrong of me to do so.

From experience - The longer you don't tell them, the harder your choice will be...

j_ball430
12-05-2005, 01:02 PM
Originally posted by SprintCellFone@Dec 5 2005, 06:23 AM
So today I will talk to them seperately. If all goes well, and all of them do not hate me, should I go with the one who is least hurt by how i have been flurting with other women and what not behind her back? It seems to wrong to go with her because it gives me the impression then that she is less worried about that and gives the window of thought that she might be okay with because she might decide to cheat with others even if her and I decide to see how things last. Whereas the one who most affected probally had liked me more and probally is the best candidate for a long lasting relationship because she is against the idea of cheating on others the most.

How should I choose?
Depends on what you want. For a person that you love, what is the reaction from them that you desire? Do you want one extremely forgiving, maybe too much that she's fine with what you're doing because she is doing the same? Or because maybe she's just that madly "in love" with you, which would lead to me that she either doesn't have her head on straight, or maybe she just truly loves you like that no matter what you do, she's willing to accept you. This could be a good or bad thing. I personally don't want a woman who shrugs off all my mistakes, but I'd also rather not have a girl who holds me to impossible standards.

There's also the pissed off reaction. I feel that if a woman TRULY loves you, she's going to be understandably upset. This may include days of not speaking to you, and possibly some harsh words. For me, I'd prefer this. This shows me that she has a genuine care, and trusted you enough to feel this way. This could also mean that she's very selfish, but I'm sure you'd be able to tell the difference from her reaction. This reaction may also mean that she's holding you to impossible standards and will hold you accountable for all your major AND minor mistakes.

Those are the extremes, so I doubt that the reactions will be exactly like this.